Before His Experience

"I am at one of the lowest points of my life. I spend my days confused as to why I am not happy with myself, why I do not treat others better (including myself), why my stress level is so high, and how things are ever going to get better. It's not as if I do not have things to be happy about. I have a family that I love and a good job with a great company. My finances are in order. What I do not have is my self. How can I have what I don't know?"

Craig spends the majority of his waking hours thinking about what he needs to do as a manager, customer (to his suppliers), coworker, father, husband, etc; what he needs to do in the short term (such as get in shape) and the long term (such as retire). Like so many, Craig's focus on doing things provides little room for thoughts of being someone. He wants to be a different person. He knows when he would like to be (now) and why he needs to be (because life has to get better). He knows what he would like in life (the opposite of much of what he has today) and where he would like to be (surrounded by family and friends living with peace of mind, joy and fulfillment). He knows who he wants AND needs to be. He doesn't know how to be it.

Like so many, Craig's work/life balance is non-existent; in the sense that there is no (positive) balance. He has work. He has a life. Both maintain a balanced level of stress and frustration. As far as positive balance is concerned picture a teeter-totter with both seats touching the ground. Craig's life isn't unbalanced. It's broken.

During His Experience

As Craig's Experience begins he quickly realizes that he is attempting to achieve self-actualization without self-knowledge; to fulfill his potential on the outside without knowing who he is on the inside. Craig's desire to change is not supported by the knowledge necessary to do so.

Working with The DLS Experience Hierarchy of Self Craig sees that without self-knowledge (consistent) self-discipline is not possible. He comes to understand that to bridge the gap between self-knowledge and self-discipline he must maintain self-awareness and self-acceptance. In all of this he realizes just how little he knows about his self.

As his sessions unfold Craig develops his self-knowledge (level 1 in the Hierarchy of Self) through the identification and definition of the values, beliefs and purpose required to fulfill his potential. He identifies and begins using triggers to remind him of who he needs to be, i.e., to maintain self-awareness (level 2). He learns how to stop (negatively) judging, criticising and rejecting his self, i.e., to maintain self-acceptance (level 3). He learns the conviction necessary to act on what he accepts, i.e., to maintain self-discipline (level 4). Finally, he learns that self-esteem (level 5) and self-actualization (level 6) are the output of the first 4 levels. By learning how to fulfill levels 1-4 Craig fulfills 5 and 6.

As with everything Craig does a process is followed to achieve a desired outcome. If he can't complete the steps within the process the outcome becomes something less than expected. If he allows anyone, including himself, to interrupt the process the outcome once again becomes something less than expected. If he cannot complete the first step, regardless of circumstance, there is no outcome.

In learning the Hierarchy of Self and the concepts and tools that surround it Craig learns the process required to fulfill his potential. He applies the process to his email communication and the desired outcome is reached. This includes getting more done in less time. He applies the process to his verbal communication in meetings and achieves a similar outcome. He applies the process to his interaction with his team and expands the benefits by fulfilling his potential while helping team members do the same. As Craig states, "My team is more open with me. We are getting more done and are having more fun in the process." He applies the process at home and dramatically improves the relationship with his wife ("It's better than ever. We just want to be around each other so much more than we used to.") and with his children. He applies the process within his self and life changes altogether.

As Craig works through the process of being he is surprised by how much different his focus is. Thoughts once engulfed in doing something are now focused on being someone, for his self and others. The less he thinks about what he needs to do, the more he gets done. He is not only getting more done he is doing so in less time and without stress and frustration.

Less than 5 months into his experience, and with just a few sessions remaining, Craig is "Sleeping better than I have in years." Days filled with negative emotions, to include depression, are now filled with hope and fulfillment. He is more motivated than he has been since college (some 20+ years ago). He is doing more for his self. Contrary to popular belief, he is doing more for others as a result. The challenges in life are still there. The difference between now and 5 months ago is that Craig has a process and associated level of understanding from which to deal with them.

Craig's Experience lasts six months. He has made changes in this period of time that he was unable to change for more than two decades; changes that will last for decades to come. During his Experience he worked through 24 one-hour sessions: the equivalent of one day in his life; a single days worth of self-discovery that has led to the discovery of a lifetime. Craig sees his experience as, "An amazing story that came true!" He also sees it as one that will never end.

After His Experience

Craig's Experience ended in March 2006. In March 2008 he was dealing with arthritis in his knee. He had some serious dental work completed. His mother was not well. As Craig stated at the time, "I have been able to cope with all of it. This would not have been possible before the programme."

Prior to the programme Craig was taking an anti-depressant. Before the programme ended he was no longer taking it. When he comments on being able to cope with all of it 'coping' includes not going back on the anti-depressant. Anyone who has suffered from depression knows how significant an achievement this is.

Craig is coping so well that he has been promoted since the end of his Experience. A member of his team recently told Craig that he is the best manager he has ever worked with. Another individual, new to his team, told Craig and others that Craig is one of a small number of managers in the company (2500 employees) that he would like to work with. This is saying a lot for someone that no one wanted to work with a few months ago. He credits each accomplishment to his 24hrs of self-discovery.

When asked what he would like senior management to know about his experience Craig states;

"I can see everybody benefiting from the programme, regardless of their needs. It can make the company that much better than it already is. I cannot say enough good things about it."

When asked what he would like others to know about his experience Craig states;

"It opens your eyes to so many things; so many possibilities. It sets your priorities and everything happens from there. I gained more than I ever believed I could."

Why did Craig change? In his words, "Because I wanted to. More importantly, because I needed to."

With the exception of his finances (they were already in order), Craig's entire life is not only in order, it resides on a plain miles above where it was before. While the programme provided the process and associated understanding required to create change, it is Craig's willingness and desire to change that makes his amazing story, and that of others, possible.